Category: Family

Six Powerful Tips On How To Guide Those Who You Love ~ Shaykh Omar Suleiman [Very Important]

You can’t guide those who love. When you read the story of Nuh (a.s) and that painful moments with his son, a prophet who called to Allah for 950 years, only had about 80 or so people and a man who loves his wife and who love son so much… the Shahadah of the wife of Nuh (a.s), the testimony of his wife or his son would be so much more beloved to him probably than everybody else, rights? Your family and he doesn’t have that.

At some point you either resign yourself and you say you know what I can’t do anymore. I just can’t help this person anymore. I can only pray for them and sometimes that person will die without you having been able to come to their aid or come to their help or come to their rescue to help them see the error of their ways and to move forward even and it’s not just human beings by the way even Allah subhana WA Ta’ala.

Though Allah always leaves the door of Tawbah open  Allah subhana wa ta’ala talks about a group of people who insist upon the disobedience and no reminder is benefiting you know what? You want this dunya? Take it, go ahead them whatsoever at this point.

You can’t help someone who’s not willing to help themselves we know that but you can still love them even when your efforts have failed. They can’t stop you from making their dua for them. “You’re still in my prayers, I still love you, I still want what’s good for you”.

So the first thing you can’t help someone who’s not willing but you can still love them while your efforts have failed.

Don’t despair in people because if they see you despair in them that might be what causes them to despair in themselves. show people that you believe in them that you’re not giving up on them because they’re gonna hit a low point if they’re making mistakes and eventually when that happens. they’re gonna wonder if they have a chance to come back and you always have to be in their corner even if they’ve pushed you into a corner and say you do have a way back to Allah subhana wa ta’ala and you do have a way to come to come back to that success in that salvation.

If someone is trying to help you or give you Nasia, give you advice. If someone loves you and cares enough about you to make an effort to stop you from doing something that they believe is wrong at a major mistake, don’t do it in a perfect way, overlook those imperfections in the way that they’re trying to help you and instead appreciate the fact that they’re trying to help you.

– Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Mashallah! Upgraded With Eight Girls [Super Excited]~ Mufti Menk

When a child is born we thank Allah. We want the child to be healthy. Whether you have a male child or a female child, thank Allah.

Mashallah, we upgraded with eight girls and I’m super excited to mention it here because I am so happy and I’m super excited to mention it here because I am so happy that Allah blessed us with a favour He says you have girls you get Jannah. By the way it doesn’t mean you have boys you go to Jahannam.

Be happy with whatever Allah has given you girls, they are girls. They are boys, they are boys, Alhamdullah. They are boys and girls Alhamdulillah.

Neither boy nor girl Allah knows why He has saved you from something traumatic. How many people have children and they say I wish I didn’t have these kids because of the torment that some of them make their parents go through. May Allah forbid and may Allah protect us and our children from that type of behaviour, Ameen. So be thankful to Allah- Mufti Menk

One Of The Worst Questions To A Married Couple – Mufti Menk

Children are a gift from Allah but they can also be a source of stress and distress. so when Allah has given you children, thank Him and ask Him to help you to raise them. When Allah has not given you children, thank Him and be reassured that He has protected you from something or He knows something that you don’t know. That’s why He did not give you the child.

You know what is one of the worst questions, you can ever ask a married couple? When are you going to have children? That’s a very bad question. You know why? In a lot of cases it’s not even in their hands. They want to have the children but they cannot.

Infertility is increasing on the global level. I don’t know if you are aware of that.

Pray for people rather than asking a question that will bring tears to the eyes of the couple or at least the woman. May Allah grant us ease.

And then people start looking and saying I know the problem is with her not with him. How do you know? Even if they told you I know of a sister whom.. They don’t have children and the issue is with the husband but she takes the blame for that man, subhanAllah. She says no, no, it is an issue with me.

I say look at this she wants the honor for that man who would do that? I want to say something controversial. I don’t think many men would take blame for their women.

Why Marriages Go Wrong & Its Prevention [Powerful] ~ Mufti Menk

Differences are normal. You love your spouse. You will differ with your spouse. You love your children, your parents, your siblings whoever you love, you will never think exactly the same. There might be a little bit of common factor in thought but never 100% the same. That’s how the almighty made you. It’s how you deal with the difference that distinguishes the donkey from the horse.

That’s what distinguishes the one who is closer to the Almighty from the one who’s not. The way you react, the way you use your mind and the way your words come out it requires discipline. That will make you the best of people. Are you ready to speak with utmost respect in your home to begin with, refer to your loved ones as loved ones even if you had a difference?

Tell them how much you love them. the problem with us when things go wrong we open our mouths and we haven’t realized for 19 years things were going right.

The world is such today that people get married without knowing why they’re getting married. They don’t know what marriage is they’re coming together. The biggest sacrifice, that’s what marriage is.

But now it is very sadly and unfortunately the rate of divorce is so high? Can I tell you one of the reasons? When we get married and we don’t watch our tongues, things begin to go wrong because you didn’t watch your mouth and the Almighty warned you at the beginning when you were getting married watch your tongue.

We are not romantic enough but romance is being shown to those besides the one whom it is supposed to be shown to that I love you and the beautiful emoticons and emojis that are continuously being created on platforms that are increasing on a daily basis, all sent beautifully a thousand times mashallah but to the wrong number. That’s where we’re going wrong. If you had to send one tenth of those to the person they were supposed to go to you’d be having walima the following day la illah illa allah.

The prophet (saw) says it’s an act of charity: a good word is an act of charity which means it’s an act of worship. When you think before you speak you have actually worshiped Allah. Because you are using what he gave you and that’s your brain that’s what distinguishes man from animal is the brain, subhanAllah.

if you are really a pious person it shows in the softness of your character but if you’re reading one Quran every three days but you’re abusing someone that Quran you’re actually doing for someone else. watch your tongue, make people feel good, empower them,

If you would like to know maybe of the sisters here are being abused not just here but across the globe, by men who think that they are their bosses and you’re not. Our boss collectively is Allah. He is our maker. Fear Allah, be conscious on Him.

When you are hurting someone, when you’re abusing someone, when you are maltreating someone, remember it’s just a debt that shall be paid back in this world before the next. The Almighty will create someone one day to do exactly the same to you. if not you’re going to face the consequences on the day of judgment which will be even worse.

 

Moisten your tongue with the remembrance of Allah and you will never go wrong.

Remember one thing Islam is not only about five daily prayers, Islam is not only about going for Hajj, Islam is not only about giving charity, Islam is not only about fasting in Ramadan is is also and equally important protecting yourself from abusing others, from hurting others, from usurping their wealth, from doing something wrong to them as much as you have to fulfill the rights of Allah, you have to fulfill the rights of the rest of the creatures of Allah.

You want to change your life while you’re connecting to your Maker, learn to respect those whom the same Maker has created, starting with your spouse. The Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) says the best from amongst you is he or she who is best to his or her spouse. Am I the best? I need to aim for that.

  • Mufti Menk

I Have A 50% Say – Mufti Menk

If you want to be helped help others. The hadeeth I mentioned the almighty tells us through the Blessed lips of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam that Allah almighty continues to be in the assistance of those who continue to assist others.

It actually is the blessing within your life, the blessing, the Baraka, the contentment and over and above that on the Day of Judgment when you see the reward of it. It’s tremendous, it’s great, and you will never regret it. Charities have never depleted wealth. I have given someone from what the Almighty has given me and because I’ve decided it’s going to happen regularly. The Almighty has written their sustenance somewhere within mine.

A man comes to the messenger peace be upon him complaining about his brother.

We have in our families. We have brothers and so on the wives come in mashallah, all of them are lovely but you must remember each one has had a different upbringing. If brother and sister cannot see eye to eye what do you expect when the in-laws come in and so many.

So the brother comes and he says o Messenger my brother’s doing nothing. I’m spending on him. I’m giving him money. I’m giving him his monthly expense and I’m actually taking care of him and now I’m tired of this and I don’t know how long this is going to carry on and so on.

Doesn’t this happen in some of our families I mean you know in the extended families?

Sometimes in some homes the wife comes in and she says hey are you gonna keep on giving this guy, you know, subhanAllah?  And that’s where the brother has to chip in and say hey that’s my brother, leave me alone. She might argue and say well you know fifty percent of everything you have you know is arguably mine? subhanAllah so I have a 50% say.

It does happen that we tend to get irritated even on our own sometimes. Do you know what? The prophet (saw) responded to this man guess what he said? Powerful words: perhaps you are getting money because you’re spending on him la ilaha ilallah.

But Allah (swt) warns us about spending in a foolish way even if it is a charity. allah tells us you know don’t be miserly and don’t even give so much that you’re giving necessity that’s yours. you need to strike a middle path. – Mufti Menk

How To React If Parents Are Wrong – Mufti Menk

We came into existence because the Almighty made us. He decided that He wants to have us here. We did not decide that.

None of us chose to be here for example to be born where none of us chose the parents we have. None of us chose the children that we have in the case of those who have children. May the Almighty bless those who don’t have children with children, Ameen.

That itself already tells us that we are here on a mission. Because when you have an examination your questions are never chosen by you. It’s always someone else who decides to test you, to examine you by asking you things out of his will, not out of yours.

The Almighty chose I’m going to create you, I’m going to put you in a place without your choice, I’m going to throw you into the deep end to see what you do and part of the blessings of the Almighty is that he did not cause us to grow like trees but rather to have families and to be given birth to.

A family unit is actually a blessing from the Almighty. Today the world is drifting away from the family unit and teaching us that you know what? You do it alone. You don’t need your mom. You don’t need your dad. You don’t need your brothers and sisters. You don’t need this and so on and guess what’s happening? We’re becoming people who are not as content as we used to be. We are becoming people who are searching for contentment in every place and in everything. Besides we’re contentment lies.

I get people who complain to me my parents are very difficult. The first thing that comes to my mind is well that’s part of the test of the Almighty: what are you going to do about it? SubhanAllah and that doesn’t mean that I encourage parents to be difficult, because it is also a test for you when the Almighty’s blessed you with a child. you didn’t choose the exact child that you got. So don’t be so difficult my beloved parents.

Remember the world is changing. it’s part of your test to be polite, respectful, merciful, full of beautiful guidance and at the same time realizing that as time passes you will need to pass the baton to those children.

It’s not wrong to disagree with your parents respectfully where you feel that they are wrong, respectfully. When the Quran speaks about parents it emphasizes more on kindness and respect rather than obedience where the parents are wrong.- Mufti Menk

How To Bring Tranquility & Mercy Of Allah Into Your Family~Shaykh Ali Hammuda

This is Bushra right, this is good news.

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “Any group of people that assemble in one of the Houses of Allah to recite the Book of Allah, learning and teaching it, tranquility will descend upon them, mercy will engulf them, angels will surround them and Allah will make mention of them to those (the angels) in His proximity.” [Muslim]. Arabic/English book reference: Book 9, Hadith 1023

Sakinah / tranquillity will come down upon them, tranquillity it feels as if all of the troubles of your life have been lifted at least for this hour. Rahmah (mercy of Allah) envelops them.

If the mercy of Allah touches you dear brother dear sister you have nothing to worry about in this life or the hereafter.

It is the promise of Allah (swt).

– Shaykh Ali Hammuda