Category: Family

Softened Heart Is One Of The Clearest Signs Of The Closeness To Allah ~ Mufti Menk

Does that for Allah; see your family, and see your home becoming a happy home because you put Allah at the beginning. the one was develop your relationship with Allah, the other one was your character and conduct because that Allah has created everything else. Your relationship with all those things watch it, develop it that’s your jannah. Those two things; how you are with Allah and how you are with everything else.

you’ve got you’ve got to cleanse yourself, take out the jealousy, take out the malice, take out the Envy, take out the love you know everyone loves nice things but when that love for worldly items becomes so high you want it by hook or crook and both hooking and crooking are not allowed ,right? It’s not allowed. You can’t crook.

Let’s develop ourselves, many of us are lacking in character. We are Muslims; we’re an embarrassment to Islam a lot of the times. We.. our dealings are not honest and then we’re looking for happiness, sometimes the way we talk to people full of swear words, I promise you we can eradicate that, we can do without it. it doesn’t need to be there. you want a happy home, use respectful terms talk to people with love, with care, with respect in your home, listen to them, help them through their problems,

we want happiness we look… we’re searching for contentment, I promise you Islam has come with so much of ease, a lot of the people actually don’t follow it. They think they do. That’s why we say don’t judge a book by its cover.

Allah tests everyone with different types of tests. When Allah tests you with certain tests, it’s on your level; you’re going to need to ask yourself you know what? This is a test from Allah I need to pass it. It doesn’t mean because I look outwardly pious that suddenly I’m gonna pass all my tests then Shaytan attacks your heart by doing what: Messing it, becoming dirty. You start belittling people.

That’s why when you see a person who’s who’s really close to Allah, one of the clearest signs of the closeness to Allah is that your heart is softened. You feel mercy towards others, that’s from the Prophet Muhammad (saw),

It is because of the mercy of Allah that you are lenient towards everyone. You’re not hard-hearted. You’re not harsh. That’s the sign of the mercy of Allah when you are really close to Allah you become a soft person. In the sense that you care for others; You have mercy.

-Mufti Menk

Say Alhamdulillah Twice When Thing Doesn’t Go Your Way ~Mufti Menk

We’re searching for happiness, for contentment for goodness for success, guess who is the owner of all those? Allah, so if start off by knocking the right door. Develop your relationship with Allah; develop your relationship with the word of Allah.

Ultimately where do we want to reach? jannatul ferdous it means paradise. Ultimately I want to reach paradise.

There is a direction straight it will lead you to a specific goal and you know that but the problem is you know we’re too engrossed in the world. There is a balance between this dunya and akhira (this worldly life and the Hereafter).  Those who  tell you to divorce yourself from this world have not understood the world and those who tell you to enjoy it to the degree that you’ve forgotten where you’re going to go, had also not understood the reality of the world. The powerful dua is in the following:

وَمِنْهُم مَّن يَقُولُ رَبَّنَا آتِنَا فِي الدُّنْيَا حَسَنَةً وَفِي الْآخِرَةِ حَسَنَةً وَقِنَا عَذَابَ النَّارِ – 2:201

Wa minhum mai yaqoolu rabbanaaa aatina fid dunyaa hasanatanw wa fil aakhirati hasanatanw wa qinaa azaaban Naar

But among them is he who says, “Our Lord, give us in this world [that which is] good and in the Hereafter [that which is] good and protect us from the punishment of the Fire.”

أُولَٰئِكَ لَهُمْ نَصِيبٌ مِّمَّا كَسَبُوا ۚ وَاللَّهُ سَرِيعُ الْحِسَابِ – 2:202

Ulaaa’ika lahum naseebum mimmaa kasaboo; wal laahu saree’ul hisaab

Those will have a share of what they have earned, and Allah is swift in account.

Do you know that if sometimes if the plan you had for your own life was granted exactly as you wanted it perhaps you would not have seen that the successes that you have seen as a result of doors being closed by Allah for you.

When something happens your way say alhamdulillah, when it doesn’t happen your way say alhamdulillah twice because it’shappened the way Allah wanted it anyway. it’s amazing. Don’t become despondent..

The hadith I was saying, one of my favorite. So the prophet (saw) was asked what are the characteristics of those who are in Jannah /Paradise what would be the reasons that got them into paradise.  He just said two words; you need two things… the people of Jannah have two: the consciousness of Allah meaning the relationship with Allah and secondly greatness in character and conduct is meaning the relationship with the rest of the creatures of the same Allah.

When you realize that everything happens according to Allah and when he’s given you the capacity to do something the energy, the mental ability, the intellect that the opportunities seize them, make use of them. Don’t be lazy, don’t sit back and say well if Allah wants it will happen. Allah gave you the capacity, Allah gave you everything you needed to get up to do it and Allah would have opened the doors for you but because you didn’t the doors remain closed.

If after you’ve done everything about it the doors were all closed and everything was closed and even the big black gate in the front became closed then you know what you got to say Allah didn’t want it and walk away. – Mufti Menk

Every Father-In-Law&Mother-In-Law Of Indo-Pak Should Listen It – Mufti Menk

People saying that in their marriages because their in-laws were not happy about their spouses marrying who they ended up marrying………………………………….

Your children choose their spouses and sometimes it will not be according to your taste because you married already. They have a different taste. So your choice of a wife may not be the same as your child’s choice of a wife or husband. So you need to make sure that you leave them with that and you are happy for them, being happy for your children make it easy for them, make dua for them.

You need to let it happen knowing that this is the blessing that’s coming into our home. If you don’t want to interact much with the person you don’t have to interact so much but please make sure that you make life easy for them, Allah will make life easy for you.

 

Remember when people go into a home, there’s a stigma on both sides. Some people think badly about a mother-in-law even before giving her a chance. Any small thing they think negative of that mother-in-law and sometimes the mother-in-law thinks on similar lines regarding the daughter-in-law, they don’t give them a chance, they believe that whatever they do was not with a good intention. They stick to their child such that anything the wife says to the son, they feel that perhaps the wife is trying to separate them from their own son which is not true.

When the child was born you decided everything for the child. As the child grew up Allah took away your decision-making little by little. The child becomes a parent or a husband or a wife in his or her own right .you cannot then decide to have that control and be upset with who they married. Give them a chance; if the two of them are happy what makes you unhappy? Why are you unhappy to see the happiness of your child that is a disease? It’s a disease that is shows a weakness in faith as even happier. If they’re happy something makes them happy so what? Alhumdillah be happy for them- Mufti Menk

Don’t Be Upset When Allah Blessed You A Daughter – Mufti Menk

Allah warns us about those who are not satisfied when Allah blesses them with the female offspring. You have a daughter don’t be upset. You don’t know what goodness is about to come from the particular child.

And when one of them is informed of [the birth of] a female, his face becomes dark, and he suppresses grief. (16:58)

Allah says we will bless you with a male or a female, sometimes only males, sometimes only females, sometimes both male and female, sometimes we may not give you a child but you need to understand it’s the destiny Allah has chosen for you because he knows what is better for you. So don’t become upset with the choice of Allah for you.

Many times people have daughters and they say oh I wish I could have a son but when Allah has blessed you, perhaps those daughters will achieve much more for you than any son could actually have brought. Because it is Allah who allows that to happen.

What you’ve got to do? Just look after those children the way Allah has asked you to look after them because they belong to Allah. As they grow older don’t do what your whims and fancies want you to do.  Do what Allah wants you to do. You will be content, you will be happy.

But all we need to know it is a gift of Allah.  Allah knows best why he gave you, what he gave you, be excited about it, be happy about it even if Allah decided not to give you children be convinced that that is Allah’s plan. Your ultimate success is when you get Jannah – Mufti Menk

 

 

The Night Belongs To Your Spouse In Terms Of Companionship – Mufti Menk

      Be in truthful company

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The prophet peace be upon him says, “A person is known by the friends he or she keeps”. The circle that he rotates with, so be careful whom you befriend, the prophet (saw) said this.

Sometimes we have friends we need to change those friends. If your friends do not teach you how to prioritize then they are not true friends.

Why did you get married? What contentment would you like? You have a wife or a spouse waiting for you. You have children who are desperate for your time. If you don’t spend time with your family, with your wife, with your children after you are married and you spend it with your friends instead all the time, you will lose your contentment.

The company of the truthful they will in fact remind you to go home, they will all disperse early because the night belongs to your spouse, to the almighty obviously but in terms of companionship go back to your family.

Your friends should be better than you in character and conduct. Your friends should be better than you in the dedication that they have towards achieving goodness. – Mufti Menk

 

Who Am I To Disallow What Allah Has Allowed Regarding Marriage – Mufti Menk

The children belong to Allah. Allah gave them to you temporarily and He’s going to take them away. He may take you away before them or He will take them away before you. It is totally up to Him. you have to be happy with the decree of Allah.

We get so attached to our children that we don’t even want them to get married. Allah gave you the children in order to test you. Are you going to do what we want you to do or are you going to do what you want to do against what we want to do? For example your child wants to marry ask yourself a question; the parents need to ask themselves obviously if both the boy and the girl would like it to happen. Does Allah allow it? If the answer is yes tell yourself who am I to disallow, what Allah has allowed?

The brother is too black you know, I promise you I’ve heard that.  Black! Bilal ibn Rabah (ra) was from jannah (paradise). He was the darkest of the lot and the prophet (saw) came back and said oh Bilal I went up to Maharaj and guess what? I heard your footsteps there. He didn’t look at the fairest of the lot and say hang on, who’s more…, who is fair in complexion, yeah yours, your footsteps in jannah, no way. ––

It had nothing to do with color. You slice here, you slice there, you slice anywhere, and the blood is red. My brothers and sisters, racism has no space in Islam, not at all. If you do not respect a person simply because their complexion is less than yours, I promise you you’re doomed.

My brothers and sisters you want paradise, understand ‘people are equal’ that’s what Allah says. The day you get to Allah and he gives you your book of records in your right hand. You can then say I did well. I travel through Africa and I witness some of the best Muslims I’ve seen in my life happen to be in the darkest corners of Africa.

Every time you make halal easy, you’ve protected people from harm and every time you’ve made halal difficult, you’ve encouraged people to engage in haram and facilitate it for them. – Mufti Menk

My Father Is Forcing Me To Marry – Mufti Menk

🛑Don’t create a disaster for your future generation ‼️
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⚡️Ask yourself a question in the same way that I don’t like people to do wrong to me. Do I do wrong to others that are a very powerful question? Because many people want to be protected from harm but they don’t protect others from their own harm.

Let the children communicate with you. If what they want is not Haram, facilitate it for them. If Allah allowed it who are you to disallow it? The children belong to Allah. Allah gave them to you temporarily just to see what you would do, are you going to do what we asked you to do or you’re going to do what your whims and fancies want…………..