Category: Marriage

Beware! People Would Die To Be Married To Your Wife While You Are Alive – Mufti Menk

People are stressed you know what? They can’t show that stress to the people they work with because they’re big guys there. They want to impress the girls at work. so they don’t show them any bad habits, nothing but you go home first thing, you start swearing, you start screaming, you start shouting, you start showing your real self, subhanAllah.

SubhanAllah, that’s why the Prophet (saw) says you know who the best person is, the one who’s best to his family members, always the best. You know why? that person has shown the family that when I’m upset I’m still a good guy, when I’m angry I’m still a good guy, when I’m hungry I’m still a good guy, when I’ve suffered a bad day I’m still a good guy, when I’ve suffered the loss I’m still a good guy and I’m always a good guy. Then you’re really a good guy SubhanAllah. But if you’re a good guy outside the home and when you come back home then you’re not a good guy at all. Who knows better what type of a person you are? Those are at home. So that’s the reason why the prophet (saw) tells us watch who you are. You want to reallyknow who a man is, go ask his wife. You want to really know who a woman is ask the husband or ask the family members.

Be honest be upright, you lose a deal because of your honesty; no problem, Allah will give you Baraka, Baraka in it.

Blessings are snatched away when sins are committed remember that. You have the best spouse, the best person Allah chose for you as a husband or as a wife. You cannot see it because you know what? You’re involved in other sins. so you’re blinded. Blinded by whom? By Shaitaan, your home is no longer happy because your relationship with Allah is weak; your relationship with Shaitaan has become strong. Your relationship with Shaitaan becomes strong you become blind what happens to the blindness? The is the best wife on earth, I don’t want to say but perhaps I should.. Should I? People would die to be married to your wife and you’re still alive…

We couldn’t see that. we’re we’re blinded because there’s some sin blinded because there’s some sin happening either this Haram income there, either this Haram relationships there, either this Haram food there, either there’s something wrong happening there, either there’s no Salah; there’s no connection with Allah. So the coolness of the eyes will not be achieved because the heat of the sin has overtaken that saying, point number one: develop your relationship with Allah. – Mufti Menk

A Lack Of Romance ! Be Inspired From The Story Of An Imam ~Mufti Menk

End of surat al-Furqan Allah subhanahu wa’ta’ala talks about certain prayers that are made by those who are close to Allah. One of them is in the 25th surah, Surah Furqan, verse 74.

Imagine a guy married for 20 years. Following his wife just looking at her face and smiling, la ilaha illaallah that that is real mashallah, what’s wrong with it? When you do something like that it’s actually a Ibadah (prayer). Someone feel worthwhile with as they develop the wrinkles on their faces, you adored them more, and you made them feel worthwhile. You know what? If she is aging you’re aging too, subhanAllah.

You need to look, you need to appreciate, you need to acknowledge, and you need to say good words, try it out at home today.

A lot of us lack romance in our homes, the prophet (SAW) talks the prophet (SAW) talks about it.

I’ve had people come to complain saying you know what we haven’t been intimate in two years.

The prophet Muhammed (saw) said to be intimate with your spouse is an act of worship and an act of charity.

Appreciate your spouse; they sacrificed a lot for you.

Towards a happy family you need to know say good words to your children; tell them how much you love them. no matter how old you are. Learn to respect others. Learn to respect the people, your own family members, talk to them, and communicate with them. Open your heart to them, help them, help them to achieve anything they want to achieve for as long as it’s not Haram let it be, Allah will guide, Allah will open the rest of the doors of the entire Ummah. . – Mufti Menk

Powerful Duas Between Sons & Mothers Will Bring Tears To Your Eyes ~ Shaykh Omar Suleiman

What does it mean to actually get the dua of your mother? When your mom or your parents will actually say oh Allah and they’ll have something that is favorable to you implied in that dua.

Allah has ordered excellence to both of your parents and then specifying the mother that she carried you in pain, she gave birth to you in pain, she fed you in pain, she nurtured you in pain, and she went through all of that for you. She deserves that honor .

 

oh my lord honor him and have mercy on him the way  that he has dignified me and obeyed me in my old age – Mother of abu hurairah (ra)

That singled dua is so precious I there is no limit to that dua, no limit to that supplication of appearance.

The dua of a mother could even get you the companionship of a prophet. And more than all of that, it could bring barakah in your life and acceptance in the hereafter in ways that nothing else can.

That blessing is induced through natural service, do things that will naturally induce a good dua,

if your parents are not alive then just as when they are alive you are to honor them with that goodness then honor them with good deeds in their name that sadaqah jariyah and those deeds will reach them and on the day of judgment they will be holding those good deeds that you did on their behalf and testifying in front of Allah (swt) for you.

If the dua of a mother can bring that much baraka on a person’s life, you better want your spouse to get that dua from their mother. husband and wife part of your making your spouse a more complete Muslim and getting that dua, and getting that baraka in life that potential … pleasure in the hereafter is when they get those duas from their parents. don’t see your mother-in-law as an opponent in that sense of Kadima because it may be the kidma that your husband or wife gives to their mother that brings that Baraka in your married life and in your life in general and your acceptance in the hereafter, don’t see them as opponents, help your spouse honor their parents.

Shaykh Omar Suleiman

 

Watch It Immediately If You Are Planning To Get Married ~ Mufti Menk

We were asking a question; are you prepared or are you ready to be a spouse, whether it’s a husband or a wife? Do you have what it takes to be a spouse? Do you know the qualities that t are required for a person to qualify to be a spouse.

If you don’t have communication skills you cannot succeed in a marriage. You need to be very patient, patience is the cornerstone. Patience is a quality that is required for you to be qualified as a person ready to get married. If you don’t have patience, you don’t know how to talk to people.

So if you don’t have patience you end up divorcing people. You end up not realizing that the problems can be resolved.

You need to learn to be slightly selfless. if you’re selfish you’re not going to get along even with the best of the globe. If you address the matters in a beautiful way you will be able to succeed in your marriage.

You need to learn how to talk to people, you need to be patient. You need to be selfless to a great degree, learn to accommodate others.

Sometimes you don’t like to do certain things. You have to learn to like to do certain things that you may not ideally like to do, simply to put a smile on the faces of those whom you love.

So this is the reason why it’s important for us to actually develop these qualities before we get married.

We need to be very kind and kindness begins at home. You need to be generous, don’t be miserly, don’t waste.

How many times are you prepared to utter beautiful words to your spouse? Words of love, words of kindness, politeness, how many times do you look at your spouse and you actually say Beautiful words to them.

When you have an issue becomes a screaming and yelling match, lower your voice.

It’s important for us to know that when you haven’t developed yourself, you really are not ready to get married really. You need to make sure that that you develop your characteristics, your qualities have feeling within you, have mercy. if we don’t have mercy within you,  the other person will not you know be merciful either. If you’re not merciful on your spouse you will never have the mercy of Allah (swt).

A spouse is someone whom you are ready to help; they’re ready to help you.- Mufti Menk

Every Father-In-Law&Mother-In-Law Of Indo-Pak Should Listen It – Mufti Menk

People saying that in their marriages because their in-laws were not happy about their spouses marrying who they ended up marrying………………………………….

Your children choose their spouses and sometimes it will not be according to your taste because you married already. They have a different taste. So your choice of a wife may not be the same as your child’s choice of a wife or husband. So you need to make sure that you leave them with that and you are happy for them, being happy for your children make it easy for them, make dua for them.

You need to let it happen knowing that this is the blessing that’s coming into our home. If you don’t want to interact much with the person you don’t have to interact so much but please make sure that you make life easy for them, Allah will make life easy for you.

 

Remember when people go into a home, there’s a stigma on both sides. Some people think badly about a mother-in-law even before giving her a chance. Any small thing they think negative of that mother-in-law and sometimes the mother-in-law thinks on similar lines regarding the daughter-in-law, they don’t give them a chance, they believe that whatever they do was not with a good intention. They stick to their child such that anything the wife says to the son, they feel that perhaps the wife is trying to separate them from their own son which is not true.

When the child was born you decided everything for the child. As the child grew up Allah took away your decision-making little by little. The child becomes a parent or a husband or a wife in his or her own right .you cannot then decide to have that control and be upset with who they married. Give them a chance; if the two of them are happy what makes you unhappy? Why are you unhappy to see the happiness of your child that is a disease? It’s a disease that is shows a weakness in faith as even happier. If they’re happy something makes them happy so what? Alhumdillah be happy for them- Mufti Menk

EP29 | Contentment from Revelation | Ramadan Series 2019 | Mufti Menk

Whenever we listen to something futile, there is a waste of time. We should actually turn away from it. If we don’t there will be a seed sown within our system that will germinate into a tree of sadness, a tree of something that is not beneficial.

And when they hear ill speech, they turn away from it and say, “For us are our deeds, and for you are your deeds. Peace will be upon you; we seek not the ignorant.” (28:55)

So Allah is telling you if you want contentment protect yourself from toxic people. There is a fine line between those who are toxic and those who need help and are willing to actually receive the help. You can help people who are open to you, helping them or you can try to help if you’re a professional or you think you can help but the moment you believe that this is going to affect me walk away because not everyone is so strong.

Allah is telling us the difference between those who have conviction, those who are convinced about what they have been promised by Allah.

Then is he whom We have promised a good promise which he will obtain like he for whom We provided enjoyment of worldly life [but] then he is, on the Day of Resurrection, among those presented [for punishment in Hell]? (28:61)

I might not have things in this world but I know I’m going to have in the Hereafter and I know that the promise of Allah will come to pass and I am definitely going to get it and that when I get it, it will be everlasting, with conviction you attain contentment remember that

But seek, through that which Allah has given you, the home of the Hereafter; and [yet], do not forget your share of the world. And do good as Allah has done good to you. And desire not corruption in the land. Indeed, Allah does not like corrupters.” (28:77)

It’s not wrong to aim for a reasonably comfortable life or a little bit of comfort. It’s not wrong to achieve things within the means that Allah has provided you but don’t forget Allah- Mufti Menk

 

 

The Night Belongs To Your Spouse In Terms Of Companionship – Mufti Menk

      Be in truthful company

      ================

The prophet peace be upon him says, “A person is known by the friends he or she keeps”. The circle that he rotates with, so be careful whom you befriend, the prophet (saw) said this.

Sometimes we have friends we need to change those friends. If your friends do not teach you how to prioritize then they are not true friends.

Why did you get married? What contentment would you like? You have a wife or a spouse waiting for you. You have children who are desperate for your time. If you don’t spend time with your family, with your wife, with your children after you are married and you spend it with your friends instead all the time, you will lose your contentment.

The company of the truthful they will in fact remind you to go home, they will all disperse early because the night belongs to your spouse, to the almighty obviously but in terms of companionship go back to your family.

Your friends should be better than you in character and conduct. Your friends should be better than you in the dedication that they have towards achieving goodness. – Mufti Menk